always be thankful

Why I am choosing to remain grateful despite of the many unfortunate events happening every now and then?

The answer is plain and simple, just waking up’s more than enough to be thankful –alive and breathing normally for the last 45 years, bonus part is I wake up everyday with that person I choose to spend a lifetime. And then the list goes like more than a hundred more.

I have a home to come home to everyday and shelter me during storms. I’m lucky to climb a fluffy bed, with soft sheets and plush pillows after a hard day work. All the donkeywork is so worth it when you have something you call home; it just feels safe.

I don’t have to fetch water from somewhere else because I have running water in my sink and in my bathroom everytime I need it (thank you Manila Water for bringing back our normal supply). Though I don’t get to wear new and branded clothes recently, I am assured I have clean and decent pieces to pull-out of my closet every working day. And sturdy shoes for walking, at least I saved a few exclusive pieces from clearance sale from way back.

While I am used to public transport, I have a good running wagon that can take me to places. Somedays I need to rush for work or appointments, I always have pin money for private cars or taxicabs because that is comfort and the only luxury I can’t give up. I have a great workplace to mention though I always think that I am underpaid for the job role. I have thoughts of multinational companies that can take me and doubled my paycheck but I’m not good in making quick decisions and not a risk taker at all. Just so that, I’m thankful for the work I have for the past 20 years.

Who doesn’t love eating out to your heart’s content? My love for prime ribs is just equally the same as my love for the smell of 7-11 meals nowadays. I may have missed eating at posh hotels and luxury buffets but then I don’t go hungry. And we have fruit bearing trees that gives us food, in fact a healthier alternative to fast-food foods. We have enough allowance for weekend markets and simple parties which we enjoyed at our loving home.

I may had lost people and pets as time passed but fortunate to have good memories of them –etched in my heart and they always serve as a reminder for me to keep going and that life should be valued in all form. I’m thankful for the gift of family and friends everyday.

Some of you may have wonder what the heck is with me and this post. Hello blogosphere! I’m missing how it’s used to be, I’m not ranting really how life sucks. It’s just that sometimes in the middle of adversity, I tend to think it never ends. And honestly, I felt I’m less prayerful now, I pray only when something isn’t right. I don’t even know how to pray properly or effectively for that matter. Whenever I try to pray, I run out of things to say and sometimes I fall asleep while praying and I would feel guilty after. So, this post is all about gratitude and inspiration.

A recent picture of moi looking in the pink of condition in every angle; my social media life screams the same so let’s keep it that way. Real people in my life knows better. 

And though there are more bumps coming my way, there may be more fall backs and life hacks, failures and disappointments and even death –I entrust everything to God.

I may not be as healthy as I think I am nonetheless I am blessed and so you are.

Smile. 😀

Always pray to have eyes that see the best in people, a heart that forgives the worst, a mind that forgets the bad, and a soul that never loses faith in God.

 

 

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holy week 2015 | BATANGAS

Life was a lot like better during this time (half of 2015), everything seems in order –my finances were good and I worry less. I remember being worried only on how I can flee the office during the first day of Bluecross Sale. Hehehe. Seriously tho, my life was so easy before and I’m caught unprepared about getting old and all its limitation. Life hacks, I failed.

As I sum up 2015, it’s been a roller coaster ride and it run-ups to so many episodes. And because I’m still tiding up my files and getting this blog up-to-date, let me take you to another Batangas getaway during Holy Week of 2015.

I’ve been to Batangas many times, beaches in majority and this trip on a Holy Week was of many firsts. This time we visited the western part of the touristy Batangas.

On our way we passed by the abandoned Fantasy World in Lemery, stopped for a while and took souvenir photos from afar. At the course of my reading, Fantasy World was supposed to be a Philippine version of the famed Disneyland but it was never completed. And visiting Fantasy World according to many is not really worthy especially if you’re coming from Manila because there’s no point of interest and the most you can do here is take a lot of photos. Plan your visit here as a side trip only to a bigger trip so you don’t end up disappointed and exhausted from Tagaytay traffic.

We continued our drive to Taal which was our absolute destination that day for the annual Visita Iglesia. Getting to Taal Basilica you’d pass by the heritage town and a lot of it brings back memoirs of Ilocos and its ancestral houses –truly it can be named Vigan of the South.

The Basilica de San Martin de Tours or commonly referred as Taal Basilica remains to be the largest Catholic church in the Philippines and in South Asia and wow, it was such a beauty and majestic. Its façade baroque structure stands tall in an elevated hill facing Balayan Bay and from atop it overlooks the historic town and its neighboring town of Lemery.

Its interior is even grandeur –it’s vast and airy and well-lit, wide aisles and its ornate ceilings is similar to my hometown’s very own parish church.

After praying the Station of the Cross led by Nanay we left and explored the heritage town on foot.

From the vicinity of the church stands Escuela Pia. This old structure is a school supervised by the church and was named after the congregation established by San Jose Calansaz during the 17th century. Agustinian priests constructed this convent which later became school for the underprivileged Taal youth.

It is considered also as one of the oldest educational institution in the country.

From Escuela Pia, we wandered and passed by one of Taal’s recognized ancestral house. The Villavicencio Wedding Gift House, but it was closed already so I snapped a photo of its opulent bordering. The house was given as a gift by Eulalio Villavicencio to his soon to be wife Gliceria Marella.

While still getting around we also chanced San Lorenzo Ruiz steps –125 granite steps dedicated to the memory of San Lorenzo Ruiz.

Down the stairs you’ll find the Our Lady of Caysasay Shrine believed to be miraculous.

The image, which depicts the Immaculate Conception is also believed to be one of the oldest in the country, having found in 1603 by a man fishing in Pansipit River. The subsequent Marian apparitions documented by Spanish colonial church leaders were first in the country.

On our climb back at San Lorenzo Ruiz steps, halfway through there were plenty of people leading to a pathway. We followed just like that and was surprised to find another sacred site.

Sta. Lucia Well is a pilgrimage site known for its miraculous healing waters. About 500 meters off the steps past a dried creek and gloomy undergrowth are the twin wells of Sta. Lucia. The present site used to be a brook where the Virgin of Caysasay performed miracles and where a church was built by the townsfolk. The violence of the 18th century earthquake sank the church but its half immersed facade remains intact. After the quake, spring water gushed out of the twin doors. (source: read HERE)

I was all observant all along our stay at the miraculous well, there were people who collected waters and some even took a quick bath. I cannot reasonably explain the rationality behind the waters, at the end it’s all faith.

After all the climbs and walks, it’s very probable that everyone was so tired and hungry. We looked everywhere around the heritage town for the famed Batangas Lomi but unfortunately every stall we went was sold out. How disappointing eh? We ended at this unpretentious eatery in Lemery which serves Batangas Lomi and home-cooked meals, I don’t know what happened next because I felt really drained. P.S. I did not really touch the meat and innards from my lomi bowl, the kids ate pork sinigang because the church says they’re exempted.

Oh, the following day is Good Friday and we’re back on the road with no itinerary on hand. This time we drove passing Maragondon, and the tough magnetic hill of Ternarte. It was ze husband’s first time to drive at this route and I did not mention any about the seeming magnetic field that strains the engine until he complained that our car might be broke. Hehehe.

Anyhow, we reached Kaybiang Tunnel in one piece. Kaybiang Tunnel is the Philippines’ longest subterranean road tunnel at 300 meters that links the towns of Ternate, Cavite and Nasugbu, Batangas.

Of course we stopped by like most tourist and had a quick photo op.

The next turn after Kaybiang Tunnel offered a very scenic view of Patungan Cove, the long drive was so worth it. And what better way to kill the blistering summer heat, beach! We drove at the access road but eventually stopped by uniform men because it’s not open to public, but with the right connections we were allowed in due course.

Patungan Cove is a fishing village and I can still recall my Tatay’s struggle when he was still the Municipal Agriculturist of Maragondon. There was no access road back then and the only way to reached Bgy. Sta. Mercedes is by boat. My Tatay spent nights at this village for so many times especially when waves get bigger at late afternoons. I know he made friends with many village folks here and it’s sad that because of legal issues some were forced to abandon the place.

Anyhow, if you’re visiting I read somewhere that there are boats from a spot off the highway that can be rented and get you at the beach.

The coastline here is not a white sand beach instead is light brown in color and clean and you get the hilly part as backdrop. It was a nice breather because the beach is not crowded. Before sundown we left and drove to Nasugbu-Tagaytay gateway. Had a quick dinner at Jollibee Mendez Crossing Tagaytay before heading home.

Easter Sunday. It’s perhaps the most unforgettable and the most I will always cherish. We had a widespread of home-cooked meals. I told you how we celebrate Easter like Christmas, it’s merry and we have extended families coming over to lunch with us. Tatay was so alive then, there was no sign of any sickness or pain. Why he was taken shortly? I know it’s nearly four years and yet I’m still talking like it happened only yesterday. I really wanted to move forward and evolve from it but many times I caught myself still shattered beyond recovery. Sigh!

I still have tons of kwentos and trips to document but I need more time and I don’t know what’s next.

Please stay tuned. ♥

 

 

holy week 2016 | BATANGAS

Back in 2016, ze husband and I decided to spend the Holy Week in Cavite again because it was the first year to observe Lent without Tatay. I thought Nanay was always clingy then and we needed to be at her side for most days. Tho we’ll be missing the holiday road trip up North, I guess it was great also to spend time with the doggos. The big B and my litol boi Astro were equally clingy when we’re home and no amount of McDonald’s burger can’t replace the presence of their hoomans. Jowk! Insert a laughing B and Atlo 😀

Hello Alfred!

Because Tagaytay traffic gets too heavy and bad during holidays we drove to nearby Batangas for the annual Visita Iglesia.

First stop was at the Carmel, Mary, Mediatrix of all Grace. It was an accidental stop actually when we sort of got lost from navigating our way to Lipa Cathedral. Not like the many old churches I’ve been to, Carmel is unadorned and looks modern –white walls and light blue ceiling. There’s not much trace of the olden eras but despite of its unassuming interiors, it remained peaceful and holy especially that location is a bit away from the loud city traffic. By the way, Carmel was founded in 1946 two years before the apparition happened to Teresita Castillo and other sisters at the convent.

I read somewhere that there is monastery garden, the actual site of the apparition, we didn’t saw it because we didn’t really go around. It was around noon time when we were there and everyone was hungry I guess.

A few kilometers from Carmel is the Parish of Mary, Mediatrix of all Grace located in Antipolo del Norte, Lipa City. This Spanish baroque church was founded only in September 2011 and was solemnly dedicated by Gaudencio Cardinal Rosales, Archbishop Emeritus of Manila and Most Rev. Ramon C. Arguelles, D.D., Archbishop of Lipa.

The parish interiors with retablos in gold.

I’m quite lost about history and some stories I should have researched prior to our visit. But it’s always good to learn something first-hand and eventually regret –I should have snapped many photos to remember all the details.

Our last church that day was The Metropolitan Cathedral of Saint Sebastian, commonly known as the Lipa Cathedral. It was formerly located on the Shore of Taal Lake and was destroyed when Taal Volcano erupted in 1754. Reconstruction of the church on the present site began in 1732 and ended in 1790. According to legend, the image of San Sebastian disappeared from the church and was later found by the townspeople on a lipa tree, which led to the town being named after it.

San Sebastian Cathedral is constructed from rough-hewn, rectangular stone and has a six-storey octagonal bell tower which rests on a rectangular base and tapers gradually to the cupola on top. ( source: read HERE)

There were so many visitors that day and it’s surprising that I don’t have any decent photos of the church interiors. Sigh! I’m too distracted or maybe I wasn’t thinking of writing about the whole trip or I was deeply meditating.

Anyhow, the trip was all worth of gas expenses and toll fees and time. At least in tough times, I have something good to look back. By the way, if you’re fasting and abstaining like me during Holy Weeks, Chowking meals are great because they serve meatless fast-food meals –tofu, water spinach, chopsuey, sweet & sour fish and of course Halo-Halo.

This day ended with another meal at Goto Me in ADB Triangle, Tagaytay City. Yes, we had rice porridge and daing na bangus to cap of the night.

Sorry for the very short info you might pick here. Am writing another Batangas trip, check out soon. ♥

 

 

P.S. Easter Sunday was always observed over big eats at home. It’s festive like Christmas. Moi at my heaviest or it’s just the wrong angle 😀

 

 

holy week 2017 | CAVITE

I think I spent too much time on social media platforms (facebook & Instagram mostly) and yet I remained hiatus on my very own space. It’s a shame really and I have no valid excuse except for my lack of interest to write life’s events. I felt there’s nothing to write about because it’s monotonous anyway. And then, I met a young lady during the Holy Week whom I had a nice chat regarding the rise of these new breed of influencers. I admire her wit and despite her being a millennial she still finds it odd to read only good reviews online, not that she detests the good life and inspiration we get from these public post, I mean can we be more truthful and write something close to reality?

So where were you during the Holy Week break?

In 2017, I spent Holy Week in my hometown minus ze husband because my brother-in-law was in town and ze husband had to accompany him in Ilocos. I had no solid plans that time but if you know me really, I can come up with an overnight plan and travel right away especially if budget was not a major concern. I commissioned ze cousin to drive us for the customary Visita Iglesia. Oh, I terribly missed Ilocos and the baroque churches I’ve been. But this time, I find it redeeming to visit nearby Cavite churches and go on a road trip, of course with my regulars –Nanay and Tita G and Shane.

First stop was The Diocesan Shrine of the Immaculate Concepcion Church in Naic, Cavite, constructed during the 1800s (Reference Wiki). I can’t remember the last time I visited this church, it must have been ages, 20+ years ago, a baptismal rite perhaps and I can’t even remember how it look like then and if there have been changes thereafter I can’t really tell now. This is the exterior, I wish I had a nicer camera then to capture the whole façade. With my iPhone on hand, and the church limited frontage I cannot do more. Please note that the church is tucked in the vicinity of a covered court, a school nearby and tricycle terminal, parking may be difficult especially if you’re visiting during this season.

This is the church interiors –simple and airy and I love the golden chandeliers.

The second church was Sto. Niño de Ternate in Ternate, Cavite. The history of the parish church is traced way back in 1863 at which time this town was under the jurisdiction of Maragondon. It’s historic on its own and if you’d like to discover more I recommend you read more here.

I don’t know why I missed a photo of the exterior minus us. Sorry for the shameless selfie. Hehehe

After two churches, we had late lunch at Lolo Claro’s in Maragondon. I don’t know but Holy Week is always synonymous to summer and Lolo Claro’s oversize Halo-halo was the perfect break from the scorching heat of the summer skies. Must try and specialty of the house is Claro’s Fried Chicken. It tasted like your all-time favorite fried chicken na talagang Sarap to the Bones!

Back on the road was our third and probably the most significant amongst was The Our Lady of the Assumption Parish Church in Maragondon, Cavite. It was consecrated in 1581 and was completed only in 1714, it’s the only heritage structure in the town of Maragondon which was declared by National Museum as a National Cultural Treasure. Tatay must have many things to say about the church and Maragondon itself after spending many years as the Municipal Agriculturist at this heritage town. I can tell how happy he would be telling stories and his experiences from way back. I remember he has this friend who owns a big grocery near the town plaza and an old friend who owns a gas station too. I know I should have been more attentive to his modest stories before.

This is Maragondon Church interiors with bright altar pieces or retablos.

And the exterior speaks so much of age and history. I love this church because the mood remains solemn despite the flock of many pilgrimage that day. Yes, I’m biased.

From Maragondon, we drove to the landlocked municipality of Magallanes. It was such a good afternoon drive because of the greeneries and nicely paved highway.

Upon reaching the quaint town of Magallanes, we parked at the side road where we thought next to the Parish Church. I noticed that the church is so small, our Visita (tuklong) was even bigger and grand, so I really thought until some church-goers came in. We felt a bit weird, I don’t know. When we went out we bumped into Shane who was looking for us, apparently she was waiting for us at the church compound. Guess what? The church we went in was an Aglipayan Church. It was an ice breaker and we laughed as we crossed the street going to the catholic church.

Nuestra Señora de Guia is the Parish Church of Magallanes, Cavite. Don’t ever make the same mistake we did, I read somewhere how he describes the Aglipayan Church more “catholic” than the nearby parish church.

Sorry for this almost vanishing photo of the church, there were too many people that time and mass was on-going. 

From Magallanes, we drove to Alfonso, Cavite. St. John Nepomucene is their Parish Church and I remember our Christmas visits to Rev. Fr. Reddy when he was still the parish priest. He would welcome us to his small office cum abode at the church compound and offer us simple sandwiches and coffee. He was my parents godfather during their church wedding and it was a tradition back then that our family visits their Ninongs and Ninangs during the Holidays. I don’t know why it stopped when in fact it’s more convenient now to travel, maybe because we’ve grown up and the parental thought it’s no longer appropriate for us to go.

From Alfonso to Indang, you’d passed by another parish church at Lumampong Halayhay which is St. Vincent Ferrer Parish. In 1851, St. Vincent Ferrer was established as a Visita under the parochial of St. Gregory the Great in Indang and in 1997 it became a pastoral center. After a short prayer, we went our way to our last destination.

It was already past 6pm when we reached the hometown. St. Gregory The Great is the Parish Church of Indang, Cavite. Founded in 1625 and became witnessed to so many life events of my family. I was baptized and confirmed here but decided to do my wedding in one of Tagaytay churches because of convenience for our Manila guests. The same church witnessed deaths of family members and friends.

This is the interior of St. Gregory The Great Church –rose colored trompe and impressive oil paintings on the ceilings. The retablo has three levels of niches and saints. The church of Indang was one of the first churches in Cavite to use galvanized iron as its roofing in 1869 and I remember how my grandfather tell us story that he was one of the carpenters who made its roofing probably in the 1950s during the restoration.

By the way, if you happen to pass by the town of Indang make sure you buy one of Indang’s old delicacy –Kalamay Buna or Kalamay Indang, it’s a traditional kakanin made of glutinous rice, coconut milk, brown sugar and young coconut meat. You can get hold of this at the pasalubong center nearby the police station and old municipal hall.

Next, Visita Iglesia in Batangas. 🙂

 

 

a little love

A kid so desperately wanting some attention, some love from her family.

She was an ugly duckling and she believed it during her growing years. No cool friends, the subject of bullying while in Grade school and the outcast during school programs. She hated school at that early because she felt no one is in-charge of her; unlike her age group in school their parents were very supportive. Grade school graduations were supposed to be a happy occasion with even one parent around, so she thought of this very often.

The kid grew up with nothing but her low self-esteem. In her teen years, she almost wanted a mask and cover up her imperfections. She’s nothing but a weakling, identified only as the daughter. She thought making good in school will eventually change how people see her in and out. Finally, she gained friends, she gained respect, and she earned the reputation she deserves but she remained unhappy. All that she wanted was a family that will be proud of her feat.

She becomes a young lady, she dreams high when she first stepped in at the academe. She wanted change but it seems too hard to happen. She experienced being mocked and the worst being rejected. Though things weren’t new to her she was still hurting. She just wanted one thing, being accepted the way she is. And she wanted love this time. She wanted someone to reciprocate her feelings. Sadly, she failed.

Her independence gave her the big change, and then she was accepted by the new people in her life. It was a major revamped of the person she was before. She slowly morphed into a big and colorful butterfly. But all the time she was in-charge of her life she felt empty, she felt worthless because she still longs for that family love. She wanted a family to recognize her significance and not her existence. She wanted to be accepted not because of what she can do and for the things she can provide, she wanted an innate recall of who she is.

She would forever be tough in everyone eyes as it’s her only defense but inside she remained to be soft like anyone around. If you happen to walk in her world, give her a big hug and pat her back and tell her, you did great!

 

 

P.S. An original short story I wrote some 5 years ago and 5 years resting on my old dashboard waiting to be published. There’s supposed to be an ending but at this point now I don’t have the eagerness to resume anything, so it’s now or never…

 

 

beatrice

Life is too short.

And why can’t our dogs live long as we do?

It’s been two months by now since I lost my baby girl. For people who knew me or silently read this blog, you probably have read about Bea (my Beatrice) and my love for her. For almost eleven years she was a prominent picture in my life, she may not be the first dog I owned but amongst it was her coming that made a significant impact in my life (to our lives probably). It was her who taught me great life lessons –how to be young and silly, to share love and kindness without condition, to enjoy the sun and even the rains and to embrace aging perhaps without regrets. She indeed is my favorite pup. ♥

In year 2007, a yellow lab came into our lives. Tho not my very first choice among her litter it was her charm that captures my heart so I immediately took her home. She has all the energy of a baby pup and probably the cutest I have met. Brown eyes which according to your Dadi was human eyes, pink nose that complete your mestiza looks.

The first year sharing our apartment with you was a big mess and a tiring one. Dadi had to go home everyday at mid-afternoon to check on you and feed you and clean whatever clutter there is. And Momi had to wipe floors after work because you peed and pooped everywhere. It gets exhausting at times but you know very well how to win me, your puppy ways I cannot resist.

You chewed almost everything from Dadi’s most loved shoes, down to the under garments, pillows, atm cards, the Cleopatra day bed you shared with Ate Shen and how many Havaianas slippers you chewed on dear? My patience was tested many times and all I can do was shrug it off because, because you’re too cute to receive my wrath.

Going out on a date with Dadi was never the same because we have you and we have to pick pet-friendly places where we could window shop, dine (a burger meal should be available for you) and sit for hours to have coffee and doughnuts. Oh, that pave way for winning the BGC story. You can read here.

Trick or Treat at Boni High Street, circa 2007

Great Dog Dash in SM MOA, circa 2008

Milo Marathon, circa 2009

Just like any paw-parent we wanted you on the limelight and we wanted you to be sociable so we calendared events where we can meet fellow doggos and humans.

Pet Blessing in Greenhills, circa 2011

We attended too many –Doggie Love, World Animal  Day, Pet Blessings and many more to count.

1.) 1st Birthday with McDonald’s Big Mac

2.) 1st Birthday at Home (which Lolo disapproves hehehe)

3.) 2nd Birthday with Purple Oven mini-cakes

4.) 3rd Birthday with McDonald’s Big Mac (again)

4th Birthday, and Dadi bought you a cake from Sugarhouse with a nice emblem.

5th Birthday with Saira and Shane, you’re cupcakes were from Tita Lenn’s Yummies

6th Birthday with Kuya Pao, a bit rush so I pulled up a quick birthday party with doughnuts and burgers. 

7th Birthday, I was initially planning a big party for you but Momi became busy so we decided to celebrate at Yellow Cab with Ate Sam and Kuya Pao. I know you enjoyed the burger and the caramel cake from Iko’s. 

8th Birthday, was a rush because Momi was busy preparing for an event back then. Tita C gave you this cake.

9th Birthday, despite Momi’s very weak condition here we managed to celebrate a little with pancit and cake.

The 10th Birthday, you were so sick a week before but I was surprised at how spirited you were at the party day. When I saw these photos of you, I knew how age has taken its toll on you but in my heart you will forever be my baby girl. ♥

We had a wagyu burger party at home and it was a merry event. It was your last birthday with us and Momi misses you more and more each day.

And birthdays were equally special and memorable because we wanted to celebrate life with you.

But not everyone loves you, there were cruel people at our neighborhood and I fear they might do something wicked so with heavy hearts we sent you home to Cavite at the parental’s house. It was so heart breaking, I’m not used to not seeing you everyday.

Blessing in disguise, your stay at the parental’s was! Because you have a bigger playground now and your reunion with Ate Shen was a happy sight.

And when a new pup entered the picture you welcome him warmly…

And became your boyfriend soon after.

Now, we have pups on the block and they were the cutest!

The second pregnancy was an accident because you try to sneak out one day and met the Lucky Boi. Oh dear, the second batch of pups were really, really loveable. And I don’t mind the special one because he is my darling today.

The Astro Boi. He misses you badly and on times the Lucky Boi bullies him he silently cries for Momi.

And now with heavy heart, how can I speak of your leaving? It gets too heavy and my heart aches really bad. I miss you, I miss you and I can’t promise not to cry every time I’d see photos of you.

 

 

 

To be continued…

 

 

today marks 3 years

It has been said many times, times heals all wounds. I cannot agree at all because the wound remains agonising even three years after.

Today is Tatay’s third year in heaven and I still miss him much, same feeling I had back in 2015 after that dreadful call informing me of Tatay’s passing. Every time I’d go back to that day, my heart skips a beat and I feel shutting down. I know life and death should not be questioned but when Tatay had to go abruptly I had too many questions then and there. How can someone so alive taken away just like that?

Tay, been really bad the past years without you. I look like happy and fine in social media sites but truth is I dunno how to be happy, I dunno how to get back on track despite all my struggles. I feel lost many times and my battles are becoming bigger and heavier every day. I wish you were here. I wish you were here to comfort Nanay in times she feels like no one cares. And I wish I am enough and everyone around would appreciate all the hard work I put in.

As we memorialise this day, I hope you’d continue to guide and protect our family. Please continue to pick me up every time I will fall like you used to when I was a kid. Every time I’d lose hope, send me little reminder that I should not be feeling I’m at the end of the rope. Make me fully understand why I have to be here and you have to be there. And, make me believe that after each rain there would be rainbow and sunshine to follow, in that order always.

Circa 2012, I miss laid-back days like this one Tay. 

Here’s to everything –here’s to you. I hope someday it would be a lot easier for me to write about you and never cries. I hope it would be easier for me to process pain and failure. Tay, thank you would always not enough for all the days you cared for me. I’ll always miss you and I’ll never ever forget you, ever. Until we meet again. ♥